Making Up In the Park..At Dawn.

So early this morning.. my dog and I just left the park..we didnt stay there long lol..a couple was there…hugging and making up..the guy was skinny and tall with skin as dark as the universe, the girl was short and thick…they argued..she got in the car…dammit…he raised his voice..then said words to make her melt of how he loved coming home to his baby and his girl… Aww they must have been a family..once….I smiled…his effort was truth…I walked around the park (only halfway around.)…respected them..got in my own car..as the autumn wind kissed me…I smiled…didnt want to disturb. .their groove…hoping they reconciled….
wordz….from my sight.. ❤

thisiswhyiwrite

ilovelove

Are You A Little Red Corvette? Fast and Easy?

After driving in the rain from my favorite place, Taco Bell 🌮, I smiled as I turned up the volumn knob on the radio. Prince’s song Little Red Corvette filled my ears as I imagined the icon singing with his guitar on stage. I was taken by surprise as I had a chance to actually understand the lyrics and the meaning. I mean, growing up I always assumed he was referring to a red Corvette but aha I was misled. Prince was symbolizing a fast woman being like a fast car. It dawned on me

Little red Corvette
Baby you’re much too fast
Little red Corvette
You need a love that’s gonna last

How many of you have been a little red Corvette or felt guilty of moving fast? lol It can be hard, especially when liking someone so soon. If you are looking for love, you are going to have to slow down and take it seriously. Serious means taking things slow. (refer to lyrics listed above lol ☝️)  Although sex is apart of human nature, we must know how to seperate the mind from the lower anatomy in the early stages of dating when seeking a loving relationship. Many daters were lucky to still marry the one after giving it up on the first night, but in most cases it isn’t a guarantee. You should always be careful to guard your heart. (and your health.)

Coming from a guy like Prince (who is as sexual as they come, bless his soul) he is even admitting that men want love from women who aren’t fast.  Sometimes women will become easy and fast when they think it’s a way to get a man to love them fast (because men are stereotyped as sex hungry) but actually the anticipation and sticking to your standards is what keeps them interested. (It makes you a challenge and challenges are more exciting and adventurous like a real little red corvette.)

He’s Just Not That Into You..or He’s Just That Intimidated, Sis!

Hey you. Yeah you. The one sobbing and crying constantly checking your phone to see if you have a miss call or a text. You’ve already sent him 3 messages before he has even responded. You’re checking his page constantly and seeing whose photos he’s liking as you dwell in self pity. Okay. STOP IT! Pull yourself together and let it go like Elsa.. (Insert cheesy song from Disney’s Frozen here __________.)

Women go into overthinking mode and an ego reduction once they feel a guy has lost interest or has pulled away. Maybe it’s not you, maybe it’s him, maybe it’s you or…maybe he’s just intimadated. Have you ever thought of that? Men are very nervous at times and they don’t show it. I have had this happened to me in 2011; especially where some guys used to ghost me. The weird thing was that they even told me they felt intimadated because I was beautiful or was an author.

Total opposite and confusing right? 🙄

It seems backwards, right? Yes I know. I would think that being beautiful and doing something that showcased my talent wasn’t anything to make anyone scared; but sometimes it does. (For the scary guys who were afraid of chances, yeah.) So before you rest your head on your tear soaked pillow self sabotaging yourself, keep in mind that THAT could be a reason as to why your knight in shining armour ghosted you. (or has pulled away.) Sometimes people have things going on in their lives, but if they wanted you then they will make sure they show their existence sometimes….in fear of losing you.

If he ghosted you due to lack of interest, he could have been doing you a favor. You did nothing, but sometimes the chemistry may not be there and the universe designs it. (It’s called mutual connection.)

Not to mention that sometimes you are blinded by illusions (believing he is amazing when he hasn’t even done amazing things for you; so instead you are just imagining what it would be like and falling for a daydream. Women do this all the time when they get too excited too soon and it leads to getting hurt. Be careful..move step by step…that’s why they call it ‘building a relationship.)

When you are in the early stage don’t start daydreaming about the future yet. If he was never in a relationship with you then save your energy for someone that’s worth deserving of it. If he treats you like an option and never a priority then you have an answer. Save yourself some time and use this time to heal and regrow…regrow like green grass. (Just watch out for snakes 😚🐍)

Dear Future Hubby, Here Is What You Should Know Before Meeting My Parents…

Dear Future Husband, (lol)

 Being a woman that has caught the bouquet in her sister’s wedding, I have decided to take notes for you. With that being said, you must know a background on my parents. Lol In order to marry me, you have to go through my parents first. Actually, go through my father first before asking me (according to my mom..because they say it’s respectful lol)

Here are some tips. (He is a grumpy old man and he asks questions back to back; sometimes before you have a chance to answer.) The way that I get on his good side is by letting him win debates or telling him he is right just so he’ll shut up lol 🤦‍♀️ He is from the ancient times and doesn’t know much about technology either.

*1. He admires guys that work hard and if you love sports cars and baseball, it’s a plus. Long ago, I only had 2 guys got meet my father  and one did not click with him lol

One guy tried to bring up football and my father cut him off 😂 He was like, “Oh nope. I’m into baseball and basketball. I don’t watch a lot of football unless it’s superbowl.” 🤦‍♀️😂 (The guy was so embarassed lol)

My mom is usually the first one and my dad is for when things are really serious.. So I usually wait before letting anyone meet him…  

*2. If you have a degree or have served in the military he likes that too. He is impressed with hard work and education. He likes that my brother in law is good with computers and graduated the top of his class at USC. So if you’re smart too, that’s a big plus. He admires hardworkers and providers. He believes men should be the head of the house.

As for my mom, she is the sweet one. If you can sweet talk her and show her that you care about me then she welcomes you with open arms. She loves baking and cooking, so to win her over, you need to know some good recipies or love to eat her amazing meals. If you can brag on her cooking then she goes crazy. Lol 😂

I often ponder on what it will be like when I am asked to be married. My parents are very old fashioned and I would love their acceptance and blessing for a healthy marriage. What are your thoughts when it comes to meeting parents or being introduced? As for me, I’m a nervous wreck. 😂 (but it’a a good thing.)

Sincerely,

Your Future Bride 👰🏾

Is Your Bae’s Actions Loud Or Muted?

I get so many emails from people I do tarot readings for asking me, Why is he doing this?Why is he doing that? Is he still into me? Honestly you don’t need a psychic to answer that question. The proof is right there. If someone is making you question them and you’re not getting clarity then just save yourself time, heal, keep to yourself. and inhale. exhale. move on. Step away.

It may seem hard to do but it’s all you can do for your sanity. If they want you then they will be there when you leave; if not then you have a clear answer. Some answers don’t need verbalism. Words can mean more if action is put behind them.

As an author, I believe actions and words should both go hand in hand. I am not my best at expressing myself with verbal words as I am with written words and my action. ACTIONS ARE IMPORTANT THOUGH! Even if a woman plays hard to get her actions of interest and being flirty is still there.

I think the longest it ever took me to move on from someone was probably 9 months.  I remember I wasted time and tears trying to figure them out and questioning myself. I can remember holding back on my dating life because I was still being hopeful for someone who portrayed little action for me. It was torture and pain and time wasted, which is why I think the smartest thing a confused person should do is move on or just take some space.. (before it gets worse and ruins your esteem.)  You’re in a confused rut trying to match someone’s actions with their words and it isn’t on the same wave length lol So hopefully you won’t torture yourself and blame yourself.

You deserve the same amount of energy in return as you put out. You will see how much easier it will be. You will find these 2 answers; either they’ll express their actions or they give you words to hang on to..like a puppet’s string..controlling you.

Each day is a new chapter and a new page to write. You’ll never know who you may meet or how better it could be. Don’t hold on to just figuring out. What are the actions saying?

 

 

Did Dating Guys With Sports Cars Led Me To Get My Own Sports Car?

I was asked what made me get a Camaro..lol I got a Camaro because I would be impressed whenever I dated guys with sports cars. The rush of excitement I’d get whenever they’d speed on the highway with me beside them.

The car wax and the nice rims.

The looks and stares that other people would give to see who was inside the car. 😂 PRICELESS!

I felt like a movie star.

I’ve always liked when guys drove sports cars sooooo I decided to save up and impress myself lol I wanted the same feeling all the time without thinking the only time I could get in a sports car was through men I dated.

The other reason was because when I was a little girl, I  saw this skinny blond woman driving a red sportscar. I  had to have been around 10 or 11 years old. I told my dad that when I grow up that I was going to get one like her. (pointing at the lady who inspired me. 😂) Well….he fussed with me for hours and said I couldn’t get one because I wasn’t born with a silver spoon in my mouth. 😂 I didn’t let that mental doubt succumb me.  Now whenever dad comes over he is taking photos of my car and always asking to take it for a ride. Lol  😂 However, I’d like to get a Masarati next but I am thankful. Word of advice: Don’t put a limit or a hold on what you want. Don’t think you have to get the easy way to get a small piece of the big things. Ya digggg?

 

I’m A Flower Still Waiting To Be Given Flowers…

💐Okay so I can imagine all the weird facial expressions that people would give me when I told them I’ve never received flowers from a man before. I’ve had people tell me, “Yeah right. You lying!” but honestly I’m not. sips tea ☕😂 By the way, tulips are my favorite flowers. 😊 So I guess I’m just a bit old fashioned, huh? I love nice things, but the little gestures means so much. Receiving a text that says “Good morning baby, good morning queen.”  is the closest thing to receiving flowers sometimes.

The feeling of importance and being on someone’s thoughts is just like virtually handing me flowers. I get all giggly and roll around in bed whenever I’d receive a morning text. I can only imagine what it will be like when I am gifted flowers 😂. Sigh. When dating, I never ask a man because I wait to see if he will so I am waiting 😂 (or hinting. Lol)

Not sure if men still think flowers are a sweet gesture because times have changed. I love flowers because I enjoy gardening and growing flowers. Flowers remind me of a beautiful woman that’s rare to find. They should be cared for and nurtured, they’re delicate and they attract bees and butterflies (just like women attract men and are pursued.)

The sight and smell of flowers always uplifts my mood and they are so naturally beautiful within and out. It’s amazing how something created from God can grow from the earth and just be a simple expression to save a relationship at times. Not many women care about flowers as much as I do, I’m told. I was told that some men don’t believe in giving flowers anymore because they think all women want material things. 

 What I am saying is, while I don’t mind being spoiled, a bouquet of flowers makes me happy. 😊 I know I could have just asked guys and had them given to me, but I don’t want to to ask for special moments like that. I want whom ever I’m with to just surprise me and catch me off guard. I love surprises!! 😊 I used to feel like a misfit because so many girls and women have already experienced that moment and here I am at age 34 still awaiting like a 15 year old at a sleepover ; giggling about what her first kiss will be like lol

The good thing about it is that who ever gives me my flowers will be the first, making him someone to stand out than anyone from my past. 😊

I’ve had guys tell me they would have given me flowers but it was usually the ones I wasn’t interested in lol (topsy turvy, huh?) lol My best friend told me that his girlfriend is 35 and that he was the first to give her flowers. Everyone has their season or flower season. Everyone has their once in a life time moment that happens on it’s own without force.

I remember thinking, how is it that they call me I’m beautiful but I haven’t received flowers yet? I’d be thinking, ‘Is there something wrong with me?’ Hahaha but no, there is nothing wrong with me and I don’t want any other woman to feel that way either. I see it as God holding off on that moment so the man meant for me will show off. God saves things that are meant to be special for you for the special person and at the special time. Just as when you have to wait until Christmas to open your amazing gifts, it will feel more special. I have a bucket list of things I am still waiting to do that I haven’t experienced yet with a man and I know it’s a sign from God that those moments will be shared with the one I may marry …making it the best!!!!😉

So raise your glasses and make a toast 🥂 for knowing that your inexperience is a gift awaiting to be unwrapped. ..

For the moment, see yourself as a flower awaiting to be sniffed by a handsome and rare bee. 🌺🐝

Seperate The Body From The Mind* Words From A Sapiosexual.*

I love my body, but my body and my mind are 2 different things. lol One is just flesh and one is who I am. I have only fell my hardest for one or two men that never seemed like they were just trying to date my shell (my body) The slower you try not the rush the more I build attraction for you. My shell is something that will turn into ashes one day..I just make sure I take care of it to the upmost while I am alive. My soul is soooo amazing and interesting. 🙂 It’s also why I’m so picky. I am a sapiosexual. If you are attractive, I have to be even more attracted to your mind. I fall for mental connection. You want me for what’s inside or you want me for what’s both on the inside and the out? ❤

Yes, But Are You Working On You Prior To A Relationship?

2010.. This is 24 year old me! 🙂 If I could re-live my 20s again and start over I would. I accomplished a lot, but I felt like I wasted time focusing on things/people that were less important. See, in your 20s, you’re suppose to be enjoying life and be stress free. You’re suppose to be planning the future, living in the present and learning/growing from the past.

Sure, I accomplished a lot in my 20s, but I wasn’t really living. I felt I would have been way ahead in my 20s had I not let things distract me. At this age, I had finally moved on from my 2005 sexual assault that occured in college at the age of 18. I was also 2 years free of self abuse.

I was happy in this photo because I was with my family, but behind this smile I was going home to in an unhealthy relationship. An unstable relationship where I was being taken for granted; giving my all for so little and putting myself last. I was half way into loving myself again, but little did I know I needed space and time to work on me. I needed to know what self worth meant along side of self love.

In order to do that, I needed balance after full recovery from my past. I didn’t start going in full effect of my self love journey until 2012. I had to end that unhealthy relationship to recover, build self love and understand self worth. After following that, I become a better version of myself; it is who I became today.

So before you enter into a new relationship or anything in 2020, make sure you have had enough time to work on you. It took me 7-9 years to be this much in love with myself. I have the strength of Wonder Woman! (*grabs super hero cape and soars into the air!🦸‍♀️)

Still Searching For My Chic Tribe In 2020! I NEED SOME GIRLFRIENDS!!!!! 😂

I love making friends with women when I travel. I always give a compliment and we’ll hit it off and then I’ll be like, why didn’t I ask for her facebook ? Lol (then I don’t see them anymore.) Sometimes it can be hard to find friends with some women, especially when society makes them think we need to compete. No offense or not to sound cocky, but if you are an attractive female it makes it even hard. If you have a diverse personality it can be hard too. I am a little of both. I am very careful and extra nice when I try to make friends.

Some women make it seem like because I like to get dolled up, that it means I must think I’m better. Nah. I am not that way at all, but we can both feel like we are magical. 😊 We should feel like a powerful group when we get together instead.

We can encourage each other with inspiration and motivation to make each other better. I am not interested in that competition or envy stuff. I am never the envious or competitive type, but I would find it hard to fit in. You can’t be friends if you seek or worry on that. I don’t want that at all.

Honestly, I just want to find my chic tribe. I want a bond with like minded women like myself. No drama. No competition. Just a good time. Good laughs and discussing the topic of men over good drinks. 🍸🍸😂

If you have a man problem, I want our group of friends to come over so you won’t be up crying all night. (with a gallon of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream. 😂)

To say I am popular on social media, I only have 2 close friends in reality that I talk to. One is married with a family of her own and one lives with his girlfriend in Miami. The married friend is like a sister to me and I wish I could make her into a clone because we have been best friends since college. (but she lives an hour and a half away in Charleston. 😫 )

I have always felt more more like myself talking to the same energy as hers or with guy friends (or feminine gay men lol) So I’m kind of just a loner waiting on building my clique. 😂 I am into so many different things so I hope others accept that and click with my diverse side. Lol

I know finding more friends is an insecurity I must work on. This is one of my goals for 2020; to find some real life friends that click with me. It can seem hard, but I am still looking to find my girls. I want some friends that love to go to the gym, do 5ks, have a wine and painting girls night out, go see movies, comedy shows. I know they exist lol