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8 Things I Learned From Facebook

Ahh facebook…the book that is an open book where people don’t say things to your face. (Insert thumbs up emoji here ____ ๐Ÿ‘) During the year 2020, I had a total wake up call of re-evaluating myself.

When I say re-evaluate, I had to sit back and observe. So over the year, I have learned what this creepy website has taught me over the years whilst I reflect. Here are the top 8 lessons I have learned in numerical order

  1. People Put Too Much Of Their Life Out There. Yes, by all means share what you want, it’s a free country but sometimes I’ll see posts where people are giving a whole reality TV series of their life. Every rant, everything about their sex life and everything about everything. I used to be a victim of this as well, but I stopped. I stopped when I realized strangers knew more about me than people that knew me. It can be scary and sometimes dangerous.
  2. HATERS Things that make you go hmmm. This taught me that haters will be on to you like a hawk… old enemies from high school and people who will try to throw shade in your posts or DMs lol NEXT!
  3. DRAMA Of course, when facebook asks what’s on your mind it’s an entrance for trouble. When you share your opinions that others don’t agree with this stirs up a whole lot of chaos hence why I never go that route. Phew. Ever notice if you share some bad news you get more reactions than you do with good news? People who barely interact with you suddenly come out of nowhere. Where you been hiding? ๐Ÿ˜‚
  4. Unfriended For No Reason What’s confusing is that I have had classmates I grew up with, friends and family I thought I were cool with suddenly unfriend me. I didn’t understand why because I never post anything negative etc. I think sometimes people have to unfriend you due to jealousy and that can be sad.
  5. Copycats I admit, I am flattered a lot but there are people that will study you just to take your ideas. Hence, I don’t tell my plans anymore.
  6. They Won’t Hit That Like Button Or Show Support I get a lot of support on my books, blogs and business from strangers than I do from people I know, believe it or not. It’s weird, I’ll get up to 1000 story views, but under 20 likes…makes me wonder if some of the people on my page are really there because they like me or just to get details to talk about me and not to me.
  7. Some Married Men/ Unsingle Men Stay In Your Inbox Yeah, I don’t have to explain this one, but I’m like WHY?!!! ๐Ÿ™…โ€โ™€๏ธ
  8. Just To Brag and Show Off….. When I found out that some people will actually use facebook to brag for an ego boost my eyes widened. I admit, sometimes I share my good news but some good news I like to keep to myself. There are people who use it just to brag for relief and validation. When it gets to that point you have to ask yourself are you depending on others for your happiness?

So there you have it. I don’t use facebook deeply for some of the things I used to. Instagram seems to make it easier with privacy, but Facebook is good for keeping up with some things and sharing the positive aspects of my life.

Use it with caution!!! It’s like the tree of good and evil ๐Ÿ˜‚

Cheetah/Leopard Girl Vibes

So I have a secret..lean in closer and I’ll tell you.. ๐Ÿคซ

a little closer…….. ๐Ÿ˜Š

I HAVE AN OBSESSION WITH LEOPARD CHEETAH PRINTS!!!! What could welcome the season of autumn than the prints of a cheetah? When I saw these were on sale from Fashion Nova, I immediatly made my purchase online. I have always wanted to own a pair of cheetah print leggings and here they are snugging tightly to my glorious curves. The brown and black print naturally fits with the autumn weather and the bronzeness of my complexion.

The leggings don’t feel thin, the fabric is actually warm ad stretchy giving me a comfortable sensation. I have another confession, I wore these leggings two days in a row because they are so comfortable. They can also be worn in a dressy style with a brown or black top. I worked out in them and they make working out easy because of the material.

Get your pair of cheetah print leggings here, your legs and your booty won’t be sorry. ๐Ÿ˜š https://bit.ly/34tlAEs

Renita XOXO ๐Ÿ’‹

How To Embrace Your Chocolate, Sistah.

I just got an email from one of my blog readers telling me sometimes she doesn’t feel  confident with her dark complexion. She’s so very beautiful both inside and out and maybe 19 years old… so I am trying to figure out why would she be so concerned.  Beauty on the inside brings out beauty on the outside however. I am always humbled when I get emails from my readers that I inspire, but if you have low confidence because of your skin, you are going to have to work on your inner confidence FIRST and foremost. This mentality is forced down from the slave masters and from the media, sadly. Please don’t allow this to burden you from those who are still in mental slavery. They’re the losers! To judge someone for their complexion is insane- rather lightskin or darkskin.

Alek Wek -ใ€Biographyใ€‘Age, Net Worth, Height, In Relation, Nationality

I remember seeing this African model on MTV many years ago and she had a short bald hair cut. Many black people (our own people) would say she was unattractive while the other races praised her. However, when she walked the runway and spoke with confidence she appeared and seemed beautiful because she was beautiful from within. If she had any flaws, her inner beauty made her look super beautiful.

One thing I love to do is learn from the African models on Instagram and whenever I am traveling.. because they have amazing confidence and they embrace their feminism. When I’d travel to big cities, these ladies were full of confidence and always loved to dress up.

I admit, I am a stalker of Sedanase, Ghanan and Ethiopian models and I love being inspired by other women instead of being envious. LEARN AND EMBRACE! Most importanty, if you really want your dark skinned to be noticed and feel confident, the secret is to wear bright cool or bright warm colors. Another tip is to add a hint of cocoa butter oil to the skin or cheeks. This adds a certain glow to the skin. For some reason that is like seeing magic. Trust me! 

If I were darker, I’d probably wear bright colors all the time just because of how it draws attention to chocolate skin. Luckily, you don’t have to really worry about acne scars or wrinkles lol You just need to love being you and keep looking good and feeling confident. Hope this helps..
-ReNita XOXO ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’‹

Dress With Class If You Don’t Want To Attract Trash

Yes, crew! I have been a victim of this in my early 20s. I remember wondering why did I always attracted perverts or men that only wanted to try getting into my pants. Insert 20 something photo below. ๐Ÿ‘‡

Can you believe I went on a date in the left photo dressed like that and expected to be treated like a queen? and then come back home complaining about how the guy was such a pervert or a creep? Thank goodness for wisdom and growth. Okay, I do believe in flaunting your curves and shape, but wearing a deep low cut with a mini skirt short as a shirt on a date does not scream BE MY MAN! It screams BE MY MAN FOR THE NIGHT! It screams, I’M HOT IN THE PANTS! Also even if a woman is dressed a bit risque (that’s a fancy word for extreme.) it doesn’t give a man the right to proceed in treating her with disrespect and perverted-ness.

A woman should be treated with respect and not be judged just from her appearance, but sadly the way you dress will give people the radar of what kind of person you are. I know, I hate believing that too, but it’s true. What isn’t fair that people automatically will assume your easy based off your body. ๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™€๏ธ

Here are some photos below that will give men an example that you are looking for a long term from the get-go. You can still be sexy and classy and embrace your body without exploiting who you are.

It goes both ways, but this is referring to women that wonder why they attract men that only want to get in their pants. What’s the message you are sending? I’m not saying dress boring or un-sexy, dress how you want by all means, but if you want more respect you can combine sexiness with class by not exposing every of your ass. lol

Not being so desperate in conversations and thirsty so soon, even if you are dressed nice. When you are just getting to know someone, the early stages and first impressions counts so much for the outcome.

During my younger days I’d dress this way at times going out, but it would give the idea that I was easy when I wasn’t. I thought sexiness and a sexy body would give me a relationship and that my figure or showing skin would make the guys I want go crazier over me and fall in love with me. Man, did I have it all wrong. ๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿ˜‚ A lot of young women believe this as well, but a person does not fall in love based off your assets. lol Yes, it attracted men but they were attracted to me for the wrong reason and not for what I wanted. I knew I wanted more.

I was dressed like I wanted a fling when I didn’t. Was it because I thought my body was the way to a man’s heart? Did I lack the self love to dress with self respect when I seeked love from others? This is why they say you can’t truly receive true love if you don’t love yourself first. Sometimes women will hate hearing that and think it means boredom, but trust me, it will help you in the long run and improve your self worth.

If you are seeking love, you should let your goodies and sexual side be the surprise within. If you love to show the print of your vagina in tight pants, have cleavage as low as the south of the border and booty cheeks hanging out of shorts, go ahead. ๐Ÿ™…โ€โ™€๏ธ If you want someone to first get the impression that you are long-term, you are going to have to not be so openly sexually at first or dress so raw during the first few dates .

If you want to dress sexy or like an instagram baddie, it’s fun too and represents your confidence of coming out your shell, but going over the top with it will immediatly give others the impression that you are fast ( even if you aren’t.) There is classy feminine, classy sexy and sexy trashy; which one are you okay with? So if you don’t want to be judged as an easy target, add some class or else you’ll attract trash. I hope this helps.

Catepillars and Butterflies.

Here is a photo of me in 7th grade before I physically transformed and blossomed into a butterfly ๐Ÿ›๐Ÿฆ‹ I also realized that people who were ugly on the inside can transform to inner beauty.

Remember when some of you all would call me all those rude names in the 7th grade and made fun of my weave ponytail? lol I admit, I was very much a tomboy and didn’t care about being pretty until my senior year of high school. I was just enjoying being a kid and wasn’t at my blossoming stage yet. So many girls my age moved so fast and I didn’t fit in. Many times I’d eat my lunch in the cafeteria bathroom so the bullies wouldn’t embarass me. 

At this age, my bullies didn’t know of other things I had going on in my life. Junior high was a living hell. Imagine getting bullied everyday about your hairstyles as soon as you got on the school bus and then being bullied in school by both girls and boys..then riding the school bus home to get bullied again. ๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™€๏ธ Sometimes when I’d go home, my dad argued so much if my grades were low or if I had gained weight. Just like the kids at school didn’t know I had things going on at home, my dad didn’t know I had things going at school.

My confidence had dropped low at the time because of people; but no matter what, I always remained sweet until I pushed to the limit lolย  I find it funny, the same people that did me so wrong are asking for my advice today and my dad finally seems impressed with things I work hard for. I’m happy about that because it shows that people can change..The best advice I can give you is to treat others with kindness. I have this belief that being kind to other people and having a nice personality makes you all the more beautiful. Don’t be negative or dramatic in life.ย  Blessings will soon follow once you are kind to others. Don’t waste time awaiting revenge. Their karma sometimes will allow them to become better people. Working on yourself mentally and physically is the greatest transformation of all.. To transform into a butterfly, you must use this time to work on you in those areas. To win and to get there is to not focus on them showing their ugly side, they haven’t transformed yet either. Keep smiling. Keep moving.

-ReNita XOXO ๐Ÿ’•

KiCk.PuSH

20200816_125851I just finished my 2 miles and I almost wanted to stop, but I kept pushing through to get to the end. I was always told if you want something hard enough you have to put in effort and make it happen. You can’t just sit around and wait for things to happen without kicking and pushing forward.

You must learn to kick through the walls and push away the negative. This concept is applied sometimes in Karate and even with skateboarding. (All thanks to Lupe Fiasco’s hip hop hit Kick Push.) When you see karate you see the martial artists going against the oppentant he pushes him and kicks him, blocking him from trying to win his victory.

In skateboarding, the skateboarders have a technique with their foot where they push to get some good motion and kick to glide through. I find it interesting that we must use the same techniques in life, but mentally. Are you kicking and pushing through all the BS in order to win your victory? Are you gliding through?

Are You A Little Red Corvette? Fast and Easy?

20200814_002832After driving in the rain from my favorite place, Taco Bell ๐ŸŒฎ, I smiled as I turned up the volumn knob on the radio. Prince’s song Little Red Corvette filled my ears as I imagined the icon singing with his guitar on stage. I was taken by surprise as I had a chance to actually understand the lyrics and the meaning. I mean, growing up I always assumed he was referring to a red Corvette but aha I was misled. Prince was symbolizing a fast woman being like a fast car. It dawned on me

Little red Corvette
Baby you’re much too fast
Little red Corvette
You need a love that’s gonna last

How many of you have been a little red Corvette or felt guilty of moving fast? lol It can be hard, especially when liking someone so soon. If you are looking for love, you are going to have to slow down and take it seriously. Serious means taking things slow. (refer to lyrics listed above lol โ˜๏ธ)ย  Although sex is apart of human nature, we must know how to seperate the mind from the lower anatomy in the early stages of dating when seeking a loving relationship. Many daters were lucky to still marry the one after giving it up on the first night, but in most cases it isn’t a guarantee. You should always be careful to guard your heart. (and your health.)

Coming from a guy like Prince (who is as sexual as they come, bless his soul) he is even admitting that men want love from women who aren’t fast.ย  Sometimes women will become easy and fast when they think it’s a way to get a man to love them fast (because men are stereotyped as sex hungry) but actually the anticipation and sticking to your standards is what keeps them interested. (It makes you a challenge and challenges are more exciting and adventurous like a real little red corvette.)

Screenshot_20200814-003153_Gallery

Blueberry Tea and Meeee

BeautyPlus_20200809172957792_saveIt’sย  Sunday Funday so you know what that means. I prefer sipping from my selection of tea in the sun on Sundays. This afternoon’s decision of blueberry tea led me to soak in some sun at our local bakery- BAKER’S SWEETS ( It’S too bad they weren’t open because I could really use one of their blueberry muffins!! BUMMER! ๐Ÿ˜–) Although I wasn’t blue, I was in the mood to wear my beautiful blue outfit from It’s Fashion Metro.

res_1597010369548This blue top accentuates the waistline with 5 middle down buttons. What I love about it the most is the fluffy vest-like collar. The blue and white strips immediatly gives me sailor vibes.

Luckily the blue pants were stretchy material with the length of a capri wear. I accesorized with matching white beaded earrings and a necklace that dangled on my chest. I absoloutly felt my most confident in this outfit. Looking BLUE never felt so good!!!

๐Ÿ› Shop the lookย  http://www.itsfashions.com

โ˜• Blueberry tea https://bit.ly/3kthzqJ

* Location: Baker’s Sweets Lake City, SC

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Why I Don’t Cuss? It’s NOT Feminine


black-woman-looking-shocked-surprised-look-on-her-face

A lot of people ask why I never curse (cuss)..even when I was working at Blue Cross Blue Sheild they’d ask me. lol I’m okay if my friends do it because it’s funny and we crack up.ย  I’ll cuss to myself, but I never cuss around people and I don’t cuss on my posts. lol
I may get by with “damn” or “hell” from time to time ๐Ÿ˜‚ but I don’t use the “S” word or the “F” word or the “B” word.ย  I let the characters in my books use them. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ You may say not cussing is just as dry as a person who doesn’t have a fun drink on the weekend or a cheat meal during a diet (I am a sinner to those two pleasures. I surrender!!! lol)
Although I dressed like a boy growing up, (so mama put me in a lot of beauty pageants to get me more girly lol) I was always raised that cussing and being loud is not feminine and is a masculine trait..so I don’t really do it.

If my friends do it, I laugh and I’m fine with it ๐Ÿ˜‚ very normal and I don’t judge. I was told a curse is a curse lol

Here is a secret, I always found that men pursued me a lot when I never cussed or acted loud too. In high school and college, other girls did that and I’d feel left out because I didn’t know how to cuss in a cool way. When I did, they’d laugh at me because of how I talked lol. My mama always made sure we came across as respectful and it showed from home training. My sister and I were very quiet girls. ๐Ÿ™‚ and my niece is the same too….except I’d get in fist fights with boys in elementary, jr high and high school ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ My mama always said to never hit anyone until they hit me first. Yes, that is the only time I’d come out of my sweet charm. (I just didn’t cuss!) ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

Simply Summer Hippie

ReNita is wearing the Astria dress from Haute Swimwear….. Straw hat is from Lime Lush Boutique ๐Ÿฅ

So when I tell you I simply love this dress I SIMPLY love this dress! Not only is it a dress, but it’s a swim suit cover up. There are times when I go to the beach and don’t want to have all the attention drawn to my curvaceous assets so this comes in handy a great deal.

I was sent this sexy little number from a company called Haute Swim Wear. Their clothing brand has swim suits, bikinis and cover ups so go check them out. I love the feel of this dress. It’s light weight and a bit see through so be sure to wear a slip underneath if you are wearing it as a dress and wear your bikini or bathing suit under if wearing it as a cover up at the beach or pool.

The feel is sheer and it has a v- neck plunging neckline with the stretchy material at the waist. (you know, the material that shows off those curves and gives you that shape.) The BEST thing about this dress is that one size fits most!

I had looked online for what seemed like hours for the perfect hat to rock with this dress so the universe showed me a company called Lime Lush. I quickly made my purchase and once it arrived, I paired the hat with the dress and realized the shaded colors screamed of lemonade on the front porch in the afternoon.

๐Ÿ‘—Astria dress by Haute Swimwear https://haute-swimwear.com/products/astria-dress-1

(use my discount: RENITA15 for Haute Swimwear)

๐Ÿ‘’Straw brim hat by Lime Lush https://www.limelush.com/natural-wide-brim-straw-hat-with-leopard-ribbon-and-bow/